What can I say? Working on and getting all of this out has most certainly not been an easy task – especially in the act of having to do it all entirely by myself, whilst fighting with the initial absurdity of it all. Indeed, if you might indulge me for a moment?
Just consider it all: In this day and age, realising that your religious beliefs -your very faith itself- were something so very different and unique from anything and everything as to stand as an entirely different religion, itself! And then, beyond merely that, you feel, not just compelled, but literally guided and expected by our Creator -God- to do this here work; to indeed get them all down in writing, and to further share those beliefs with the world at large.
Understand this much: I know for a certainty that this work is my primary point for being on this here mortal world of ours. Equally so, I know I have quite literally been guided by our divinity to do this. And yet that glaring fact remains: Putting oneself out there, and doing just this! Creating… a brand new religion, different from anything else that is out there or has ever been, here in the decade of the 2010s! It is utterly nuts, and yet here I am.
The other fact also remains: These are indeed my own beliefs. I cannot change that fact, because they are what I have come to know of our mortal world… and beyond. I was also given the gift of writing, and guided toward doing this here work. I also believe, however, that they are beliefs which might appeal to many agnostics out there.
Because there is indeed a problem in our modern world: More and more people in my own millennial generation find themselves faithless. No one should have to live life like that: Believing there must be something, some God or divinity, and yet finding nothing that answers the world that they know. Therefore, they move onwards without faith and without belief, even though a part of them desires answers for just that. In other words, they live in a state of nothingness.
I must concede, it is a feeling I myself knew all too well. In my teenage years, I was desperately searching for belief – I explored all sorts of religions, yet found none that fit my own personal worldview. Slowly, over time, I began to compile my learned knowledge from all sorts of fields – physics, astronomy, technology and computing, philosophy, and religion – whilst all the same having certain… revelations put in my path by, I firmly believe, our divine Creator, which sort of screamed to my mind: Simulated reality.
Indeed, in the writing I worked on yesterday, I shared the story of one of the many examples of this: An accumulation of, not merely improbable events, but downright impossible ones. They just made absolutely no sense on their own. I couldn’t see a clear message in any single one of them. It was only when I took them all together, whilst all the same desperately looking for a reason for why my health has been what it is, limiting my life to the extreme, and more often than not making me incredibly upset at the direction that life of mine has taken.
Then, just as I finish compiling these here writings, feeling as though I had finally accomplished something with my life? My very reason for living itself, my divine gift of a mother… she not merely drops dead in the middle of talking to me, before my very eyes – she dies two days prior to my Christmas Eve birthday, and thusly three days before her favorite holiday of Christmas, but that conversation we were having was literally about how excited she was to go for the very first time to where we were eating for my birthday.
Now, some two years later? Among my many health issues, a bizarre form of epilepsy is one of them: Reading epilepsy, triggered by reading alone. I’ve so far had four of those terrible and downright inconceivable Grand Mal Seizures (where you become paralyzed like you are having a stroke, and then immediately black out, only to wake up in agony as it is after every muscle in your body has spasmed for minutes on end). I just had one two months ago, the first time since my mom passed and the first since I began this work. Well, the fall caused something called an epidural hematoma: It is literally one of the… if not the worst… forms of brain damage one can suffer. What that epidural hematoma means is that, not a vein, oh no, but an artery has burst in your skull, unleashing a torrent of blood in so doing!
And after my first CT, it was so bad that the doctors put me in the ICU a week after it happened! There, as they told me it was one of the larger ones they had ever seen, I was asked my own name and date constantly as their testing: Despite the fact I seemed totally fine -talking perfectly normally-, they couldn’t believe I could know my very own name! I was told even then, a week after it happened, that based on the scans, I had about a 25% chance of survival – most likely to slip into a coma at any point, only to never awaken again.
And yet here I surely am! That terrible epidural hematoma I had has, in my own opinion, done absolutely no lasting damage to me… seemingly another total impossibility! But it made me take exceptional stock of my life and my being: The idea that my only blessing, my mind, could just as easily not be what it is until I reach my mortal death and move on. Then came the other random events that once more kept pushing me in this here direction: To surely finish what I had started, filling in some of the blanks and again seeking to share this here work. They were events that again kept nudging me -those bizarre impossibilities again kept popping up anew-, and thusly making me realize what I needed to do: In my belief, directed by God to finish this here effort.
Indeed, to give another example -both of what my life has been like since… forever, and why I believe so greatly that this work is important for me to pursue- that epidural hematoma was not my first recent brush with ascending beyond this mortal plane (death). Merely a handful of months after my mom passed, I caught pneumonia from my father. With my compromised immune system, I went from no symptoms to having to be taken by ambulance in eight hours. I yet again was forced to be in the ICU, as I was very near death.
My blood pressure was undetectable by any instrument it was so low – finally, they put a monitor in my wrist artery: It was 27/38. Through it all, I was talking totally normally, despite not being able to breathe. The doctor even commented that he didn’t understand how it was possible I could be like I was with a blood pressure so low. Then, the blood tests came back: It was not mere pneumonia, but rather my body had slipped into what is called septic shock.
In other words, my entire body was shutting down due to an infectious bacteria that had overwhelmed my entire body given what my health level is. The most problematic of all? A level called lactic acid was so very high indeed that I was told I would indeed die. Later, I looked this all up myself: What my level was meant a 95% chance of death -and that is no exaggeration, that level literally meant I had only a 5% chance of living- and this is because that lactic acid meant my entire body was so far gone, there was little chance it could stop shutting down and rebound.
Yet I received those intravenous antibiotics even though, and rebound my body most certainly did! Once more, here I am today! Indeed, this particular event nudged me toward compiling these writings into book form, putting them out there on Amazon and the like. I thought with that my task might be done, and then came that epidural hematoma.
So understand this much: I have continued talking about probabilities and the like. I shared an absurdity in another writing about something that I had just read and then impossibly saw on television; how complete impossibilities seemingly nudged me in this here direction. And yet, for me, they were indeed not limited to the absurd or seemingly laughable: Those impossible events also included my literal survival on this here plane; my not becoming comatose and a so-called vegetable.
Through it all -despite doctors not understanding how they could be seeing what they saw, and yet I seemingly suffered none of the severe or permanent effects- here I stand today! Myself. My health surely remains poor, yet I should either be dead, comatose, or severely brain damaged many times over. But I am not. Each time I had seemingly had a brush with death, I had recently temporarily abandoned this here work of mine – and, right afterwards, those bizarre impossible events seemingly started anew.
So I indeed believe in this work. Because they are quite literally my own beliefs about… everything! But all the same, I believe most firmly that I have been nudged -and on occasion, firmly and severely pushed- in this direction. So as crazy as it sounds, and believe me, I do know how much it does, I do believe I have been directed by our Creator -God- to do this work. This isn’t just some simple personal work or flight of fancy, but almost a personal mission in life.
Here’s one of the thoughts I’ve had: Perhaps our Creator sees the state of our world (or, even more likely still, already anticipated it and knew it would happen just so), a world where people are losing their faith because the point of progress we are at is one where those ancient beliefs -those initial and first divine teachings and instructions from our Creator to a much more primitive form of mankind- quite simply no longer quite fit with where we are at. Just perhaps, our divine Maker’s planning intended for us to take another step forward… that the epidemic of agnosticism and atheism was but a minor speed bump as we march forward as a sentient species, civilization and individual, conscious beings.
And yet, as I also explored in one of my very first writings? Were our Maker to reveal Itself in order to guide us forward? It would mean an absolute disaster. Such interference, here at this point in time, would quite literally destroy the entire fabric of our world and what our Creator sought for us to be.
So that advancement in faith must indeed come through us, lest the all of everything on this plane of existence be destroyed forevermore by divine interference at this particular point.
Therefore, once more I must say this much: Here I am. I happened to understand a totally different picture of the divine, one where all prior teachings by that divinity indeed came from that same Creator of ours; all the many different global faiths having come from the same exact source, with the purpose of so very many being to better differentiate our world and cultures, whilst instilling the very same basic teachings and moral guidance to an earlier man.
This is why I have done this work, and this is why it is so very important to me. Believe me, putting oneself out there like this? Compiling and sharing something that is indeed a brand new religion? Well, the only folks who advertise themselves as having brought about a brand new set of religious beliefs are not viewed very positively, if not outright labeled as absolute kooks or lunatics.
But all of this… well, this is me. This is the reason I have done this. I think it says something, that one person can go through so much, and yet remain positive and continue being thankful for the blessings of our Maker and God. And how is it I can do that? Because here I am. How can one not look around at our modern world and not express wonder?
How can they not give thanks for the blessing of being born in this incredible and fantastic age that we live in just now? It is downright miraculous: We are one and all connected instantaneously, 7 billion strong and we can have a video chat with anyone on this planet by incredible machines in our pockets that can do almost anything. We are now at the dawn of virtual reality, as we stream libraries of all the filmed and televised works of man all available on our televisions themselves. We continue to explore the very basics of our existence in physics and quantum mechanics. Cars can literally drive themselves!
How can you not look at this world in wonder? How can one not appreciate thanks for the blessing of being born at the right time as to enjoy all these miraculous gifts of technology and human endeavor?! Just think of all those who came before us, and the struggle they endured compared to where we are here today? Indeed, merely glance back at this particular writing: Only decades hence, and that septic shock would’ve surely killed me had I not been correctly diagnosed with septic shock so quickly and then given those IV antibiotics. Any other time, and I would have moved on to be with our Creator.
And here’s the thing there: Some folks say of religious belief that, if the so-called heaven -our ascension to a higher, perfect and utopian plane of existence alongside of our Creator- is so great, why would one not pursue decreasing the timeline of that event ASAP, in meaning their death?
Well, here’s the thing there: Not only have we been instructed by our Creator in nearly all of Its teachings to us that suicide is most often wrong, unless that particular consciousness has been specifically selected to have their end and ascension be premature. This is because most all of us are intended to have our consciousness mature for as long as we can on this planet, except for those handful that our Creator has selected to have join him at an early stage of their consciousness’ development.
But why would we?! Why would we want to abandon this plane early? Sure, in joining with our maker it will most surely be inconceivably better than whatever we know now. But even so, our own plane of existence -that world that our Creator Created and molded as such- is surely so amazing and magnificent that who on Earth would want to abandon it early, and intentionally?
I miss my mother, believe me, but even so, I love this world. I will rejoin her some day -I’ll see her again, you best believe!- but not now. It will happen when it happens. So in the meantime, I will continue loving and enjoying this world of ours for as long as I possibly can, and in the process become what our Creator wants for me to become – the person, the consciousness, that I am intended to become.
So in the meantime, I will keep up my wonder at our world. I’ll continue to evolve as a sentient being, and fulfill whatever purpose that I am intended for. And therefore, ultimately, this all is the reason I am here now and writing this as I am.
So why does this oddity that is TekARK exist? It’s quite simple, really. And I’ve already said it multiple times just now. Why is it that I am here, with this?
Because here I am, through it all. Here. I. Am. And here we all are. So let us keep expressing wonder and joy whilst we take in and enjoy this world we were birthed in, at this time we are living in.
Here we all are.